Diary of a Nigerian Babe (Part 2)

Okay...So back to my gist...., Lo and behold I became a student of the prestigious University of first choice. Unilag. Now somehow I still didn't feel like a loser throughout my stay in Unilag, because I was one of the top 7 best students again in my set. We were probably over 200 in our set. Not sure. As long as I always read, i always passed. So i finished school with a strong 2:1, very close to a first class with many hopes and aspirations to start life with. I was a good girl for the most part. Went to church, never missed classes,  always in front seats, I was now even privileged  to be a close friend to the best graduating student in my set and other top scholars. Mehn how did I get so damn lucky. Life was just pure bliss❤💦❤.

Everything was going great until I wrote my last papers . I met the other gender in my final year and started crushing but the heartbreak happened after school.  Great gender btw. I like that gender actually. It's just, once 2 opposite genders meet. Lol. Hmm. Lol. Hmmm sha. Okay, so let me tell y'all something real quick, fine boys are my kryptonite. I can sell all my inheritance and give to a fine boy, just to see him smile. Okay, that was then o. I'm woke now. But still, If i see a fine guy like this, Omo, my mumu button will just start turnioniown. 

So i met this fine guy, we vibed nd dated for a short while but it was on nd off cuz I obviously wasn't ready for dating so I somehow ended up self sabotaging everything until i broke his heart. Then ......he broke my heart back😭. It was all just back Nd forths until I sha chop small breakfast. I couldn't believe my eyes. I refused to accept the breakfast. In my mind, I i was like... Mehn. Me? My father's Princess? Royal treasure? Peculiar diamond. Chosen generation.... Heartbreak, Me? Lol... up till then, i couldn't relate to any negative word like failure, or rejection or heartbreak.  E just no dey my dictionary.

After i had my heart crushed by this fine boy for the very first time that was when it dawned on me for the first time in my life that I could actually lose in life.

Hey, don't get me wrong, he was a great guy. A sweet decent gentleman. Na me fuck up first before he na fuck up back but e sha pain me.  That was when I began to realize that there is something called failure, that it is possible to lose. My ego took such a serious hit at that time so, I didn't handle the rejection like a pro. I asked myself over and over again, that why would I be rejected, a Gem like me. Who throws away a Maserati? It didn't occur to me then that sometimes, you don't get rejected because you lack value, but sometimes it's just because you surround yourself with people whose sight are too dim at that moment to appreciate your value.Everyone is valuable and that someone can't see your worth at that time shouldn't affect your own ability to see your own worth. You are not using thesame lens with everyone. 

But like I said, I had never experienced such before, so i didn't chop my L and move on. Instead i was acting superstory up nd dan, and going all soft on the nigga, writing weird epistle. Instead of me to activate the Ice Queen in me. Lmao. That was how I became an hard girl anyway. But mehn. That's a story for another day. This was just my first taste of failure and I wasn't enjoying it one bit 😭😁🤣. Little did I know that there was more to come and Disney has been boboing me all this while. Talmbout 'Happily ever after'. Happily what? 🤣 Ogun kee happily ever after. If Hannah Montana couldn't even get happily ever after and Selena Gomez chop breakfast Las Las. Then who am I? 😭🤣💔💔.

Stay tuned to my blog. (To be continued). Till I come your way again.  Keep dripping.  

   

Diary of a Nigerian babe (Part 1)

Growing up for me was super chill. Based on the environment in which i grew up in, i had always thought life would be a bed of roses. My parents tried their best to shield me from the harsh realities of life. So growing up, life was basically all sunshine , flowers and rainbows.

There was nothing like failure or losing or rejection. Every thing I wanted, I got it. Every boy I liked, liked me back. I had passed my GCE since Ss2, just did My waec in ss3 to fulfill all righteousness.  Life couldn't get any better. My self esteem and confidence never took a single hit. I was one of the best students in my set. I was in a good shape mentally.  I felt like I was on top of the world and could achieve anything i put mind to.
 

Reality hit me first when i tried to gain admission into Unilag. Ha ha ha, unilag was like 'come and enter without knowing maths let me see you na'. Maths was my worst nightmare in school. I somehow barely managed to survive not failing maths in high school. Sometimes I failed woefully. Unilag put plenty of maths for me in post utme that my brain started over heating. English and other art sujects were my forte but somehow they decided to fill my questions with maths. Oh well, to not much of my surprise, even with a good score in Jamb, i wrote jamb again and sat for post Utme for another year. But I didn't still really know what it felt like to lose because my dad had already even started looking for a private uni to take me to incase my name didn't appear on the Unliag's admission list again. But of course after pulling some few strings and calling some of his friends in high places in Unilag he had a few friends he called in unilag and I was able to make it to the 2nd batch. Lol. I still didn't know anything about this life or what was coming my way ha ha ha....

(To be cont'd).

      

Lol. Shush eet❤

Okay so i think it can't be reiterated enough that we should be kind to everyone cuz we don't know what they are going through indoors. Sometimes ppl who smile the most have the most complicated life but they try to stay strong so you don't have to worry. That's true strength if you ask me.

I remember when I was battling ulcer during my Nysc days which was partly my fault cuz I didn't find joy in eating, I still don't cuz let's be honest  Nigerian food can be so boring and you can't be eating junks all the time cuz it's hazardrous health wise, but now I force myself cuz I learnt my lesson, lol, the hard way. If I might add. Lol.

So, my mum came over to Abj during my ulcer period, only to meet me so skinny. She was so angry at my skinnyness that she got really abusive. I'm sure she didn't mean any harm but I sure felt hurt cuz she will say mean things like, 'you look like you have aids' and all. Meanwhile i faked my smiles most of the time. I tried to be happy outwardly nd did my chores diligently. So they wouldn't figure anything out. I didn't tell her about the ulcer or any of my family members for that matter cuz I didn't want them to worry. I feel everyone already got their own issues they are dealing with so why add to it and raise their bp? Or Maybe it's just because I enjoy taking care of myself by myself and i don't like being babyied or being a burden to people. Especially with the kind of dramatic parents I have. If my mum found out, she would definitely overreact and start forcing me to eat 20 times a day while my dad who loves self medication would probably doctor me to death. He would buy the whole drugs in the universe and expect me to swallow it all. Let's not forget the deliverance my very religious parents will conduct for me everyday, the special early morning prayers and all that, mehn, my spirit, soul and body wasn't ready for all that.

So after I got diagnosed nd got medications at my dad's hospital which was for free, thankfully cuz of Govt. staff privileges and all. I took my medications nd went home. Started taking my drugs and avoiding every and any trigger. I still wasn't adding weight of course because ulcer is punishment walahi. They tell you you "must" "never" be "hungry" but ask you to avoid eating every delicious food known to man, how am I supposed to heal nd get fatter  without eating spicy foods, fried foods, jollof nd fried rice, chips,  chochlates, coke, citrus fruits, junks, e.t.c. Lmao. Jokes. Kuku say I should only eat only sand. Yet my mum didn't understand, she would mock my weight and then I would go into my room, lock my door nd cry myself to sleep every night. Battling both the ulcer pain and the mental injury triggered by my mom.

Anyway, after watching my diet, eating sphag nd rice without stew, yam or bread without fried egg, avoiding ice cream nd red meat,   drinking only yoghurt everyday, drinking plain okro and plantain water secretly, eating cabbage like a goat and finally praying nd fasting to God for 7 days which was very risky, I was healed nd till date she never knew I battled ulcer that was why I lost so much weight.

Anyway, my point is, when you see overweight or skinny people, or couples without children yet, or even ppl with lots of pimples, it could even be belly fat or a bald head,  if you don't have anything else to say, staying mute will be the greatest kindness they will receive from you I assure you. Stop asking triggering questions. Stop body shaming or broke shaming ppl. Some comments aren't necessary tbh. Don't be the reason ppl go into their closet and cry. And if you're going through any battle you're fighting on your own. Stay strong warrior. Tough times don't last forever, I promise. God's gotchya!

Till I come your way again. Stay kind nd Stay strong dear Kings and Queens.  Xoxo. Queen Elizabeth the 3rd❤.